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fic: Busted Flush

Title: Busted Flush
Author: fengirl88
Fandom: BBC Sherlock
Pairing: Sherlock/Lestrade UST
Rating: R
Warnings: None
Wordcount: ~1380
Disclaimer: They're still not mine.  Spoilers for A Study in Pink and The Blind Banker.
Summary: It really is a date, unlike all those candlelit dinners with John. And it's not going well at all.
A/N: written for the prompt square "greetings: see you soon" on my kissbingo card;the card is here. Thanks again to blooms84 for betaing.

ETA: there is now a sequel to this, Playing Patience.

Busted Flush

Busted flush: (a) in poker, a hand of cards which could have become a flush (five of the same suit) but doesn't; (b) metaphorically, someone or something that appears to be promising but is ultimately a failure or a disappointment; (c) the expression on Sherlock's face when thinking about a particular encounter with DI Lestrade. (I may have made up the third definition.)

Should have known it wasn't a good idea to come here tonight, Sherlock thinks gloomily. No matter how brilliant he is – and he is - there's always something.

In this case, the something is sitting opposite him eating lasagne and looking increasingly uncomfortable as Angelo hovers, staring at him disapprovingly. Sherlock's date for the evening: DI Lestrade.

It really is a date, unlike all those candlelit dinners with John. And it's not going well at all.

It had all started with Lestrade becoming – well, unreliable. Unreliable in relation to Sherlock, that was. He'd always assumed he could rely on Lestrade for the same reaction: a mixture of confused tetchiness, reluctant admiration and pleasurably desperate need, cut with the sort of unresolved sexual tension that made crime scenes crackle whenever they met. That's the way it had been for most of the last five years, and there seemed no reason to think things would ever change. Until they did.

The change wasn't just in Lestrade, though Sherlock didn't want to admit that even to himself. Since that stupid incident with the drugs bust, he'd found he was thinking about Lestrade a lot. Too much. Well, thinking about him at all was too much, obviously. Pointless waste of time. But not being able to stop thinking about him was – seriously disturbing. He kept getting flashbacks to that scene in 221b, which was ridiculous, because nothing had come of it. They hadn't found anything, and the whole setup was a fake anyway, just an excuse for Lestrade to bully him about the serial suicides case.

But nothing had come of that, either, not even when John Watson had shot the cabbie and Sherlock had stupidly given him away to Lestrade before he'd realized. He knew Lestrade wasn't fooled by his attempts to cover up – it's the shock talking, just embarrassing, wouldn't deceive a child – but Lestrade hadn't pursued the matter beyond one perfunctory interview the following day. And even that, Sherlock was pretty sure, was only for the look of the thing.

After that, Lestrade hadn't been in touch at all. It had been like running into a brick wall, finding he wasn't there for that Black Lotus case. Saying to Dimmock I phoned Lestrade – is he on his way? and Dimmock saying dismissively He's busy. I'm in charge.

When Lestrade next turned up again, Sherlock was so unreasonably pleased to see him that he'd almost thought of giving in and letting Lestrade have what he wanted for once. But Lestrade wasn't giving off his usual signals. Which was disconcerting.

Worse, he'd suddenly stopped responding to things that always used to work. Sherlock had tried being annoying, being enigmatic, showing off, winking, insults, deliberately standing too close to Lestrade at crime scenes, even some uncharacteristically clumsy pickpocketing, letting his hand linger in Lestrade's pocket so it almost became a grope. Nothing. Lestrade was as near as dammit ignoring him, a thing that had never happened before.

Eventually, driven to desperation, he'd resorted to asking Lestrade out.

“No thanks,” Lestrade said.

“What do you mean, no thanks?”

“I mean, No thanks,” Lestrade said. “Not interested. Would have been once. Not now.”

Sherlock was incredulous.

“I know you're only doing this because Watson's otherwise engaged,” Lestrade said.

“That's not true!” Sherlock protested.

Something in his face or his voice or both must have convinced Lestrade, because he'd grudgingly agreed that they could give it a go.

And Sherlock suggested Angelo's, and here they are.

“Does he always stare at the customers like that?”

Sherlock doesn't answer.

“You come here a lot with Watson, don't you?” Lestrade says. “He must think I'm your bit on the side.”

“Don't be ridiculous!”

“What's ridiculous is you not telling your flatmate how you feel about him,” Lestrade says.

“Why do people always want to meddle?” Sherlock snaps.

“Suit yourself,” Lestrade says. “Just don't expect me to offer you a shoulder to cry on.”

“I don't want one, thanks.”

“What do you want?” Lestrade asks.

I want... His mind flashes up those images again: Lestrade lounging in the armchair at 221b, relaxed and in control, saying It's a drugs bust! Shamelessly pleased with himself, flaunting the irregularity of the whole thing - they're not strictly speaking on the drugs squad, but they're very keen. Dominating, insistent, probing for Sherlock's weak spots, making him feel helplessly trapped and exposed. He'd never seen Lestrade like that before, and it took his breath away. And what he wants, now, is to be back in that room with Lestrade in control and issuing orders. Just the two of them this time. He didn't know he wanted that till this moment, but he does, wants it so much he can hardly breathe.

Lestrade's staring at him, as if he can see right through him. Sherlock's mouth is dry. He drinks some water, spills some of it on himself. Hand must be shaking.

“Is your flat clean at the moment?” Lestrade demands.

“Not particularly, but then Mrs Hudson keeps saying she's our landlady, not our housekeeper.” Sherlock knows he's pushing it but he can't resist winding Lestrade up.

“Don't mess with me, Sherlock.” Lestrade's voice is hard.

“Or what?” Sherlock says, trying not to wriggle with excitement.

“Or you'll be getting another visit from me,” Lestrade says, “and this time I'll be searching everywhere.”

Sherlock chokes on a lettuce leaf and goes off into a fit of coughing.

It's the worst possible moment for Angelo to arrive with the bill, looking reproachful. Also not a good moment for Lestrade to discover that Sherlock hasn't brought any money – because Angelo never gives him a bill, though he can hardly tell Lestrade that. So Lestrade pays, which is seriously awkward, and they go out into the street.

“You ask me out and I end up paying for it, why does that not surprise me?” Lestrade says.

“I'm sorry,” Sherlock says. And he is.

Lestrade shakes his head as if he's trying to dislodge something from his ear. “You what?”

“You heard,” Sherlock says. He's not going to repeat it.

“Christmas come early this year?” Lestrade jeers.

“Don't try to be sarcastic, Lestrade, it doesn't–” suit you, he was going to say, but Lestrade pushes him up against the wall and kisses him, a quick hard kiss that makes him go weak at the knees.

“You'd better go through that flat of yours with a fine-toothed comb,” Lestrade says, “because you're going to be seeing me very soon.”

“Don't bring Anderson this time, he's always such a bore,” Sherlock says. He's aiming for insouciant but it comes out too breathless for that.

“Really?” Lestrade says. “Pity. He loves a good drugs bust. And if he's not there I'll have to do the full body search myself. You sure you're ready for that?”

Sherlock moans.

Lestrade grabs him and kisses him again, a kiss that makes Sherlock stagger and clutch at him. Goes on kissing him till Sherlock's dizzy and groaning – and then he pushes him away, so roughly Sherlock almost falls over. He can't possibly be as calm and in control as he seems, but he's putting on a good show of indifference, even amusement. Looks at Sherlock, as if to say I know exactly what you want and you're not getting it. Right at this moment Sherlock would let Lestrade do anything he wanted, anything at all, have him right here up against the wall outside Angelo's, god, yes.

“Go home, Sherlock,” Lestrade says. “I'll see you soon.” He turns and walks away, leaving Sherlock still panting and desperately aroused.

Sherlock knows he's not going to make it back to Baker Street like this, but he can't for the life of him remember the nearest safe spot for a wank. All he can do is lean against the wall for support, willing his mind's map to come back into focus again and waiting for the mists to clear.


( 65 comments — Leave a comment )
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Dec. 21st, 2010 11:32 pm (UTC)
Yum! ;P
Dec. 21st, 2010 11:45 pm (UTC)
thank you! *g*
Dec. 21st, 2010 11:45 pm (UTC)


You're on fire this evening! On FIRE! (although not literally, I trust...)
Dec. 21st, 2010 11:47 pm (UTC)
thank you very much! *grins*

not literally, and I ought to be packing my suitcase (suitcase? yes, suitcase!), but I wanted to get this done first.
(no subject) - ginbitch - Dec. 22nd, 2010 12:40 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - fengirl88 - Dec. 22nd, 2010 12:50 am (UTC) - Expand
Dec. 21st, 2010 11:48 pm (UTC)
Oh. God.
Happy solstice to me.
I think I might have died from the magnificence of this.
You, dear lady, write the most amazing stuff. And had me learn a new word today. insouciant. <3

Lestrade being all bamf-y and in control is awesome, Sherlock slowly realising that he wanted it, that he wanted Lestrade, ah, genius!
(and disapproving!Angelo hovering. lol)

A really good characterisation, and exploiting my favourite bit of ASiP :)
Dec. 21st, 2010 11:50 pm (UTC)
thank you very much! I think that is most people's favourite bit of ASIP - including, apparently, Mr Cumberbatch's! at least, it's the first thing he mentioned when asked in an interview what his favourite scene in Sherlock was...
Dec. 21st, 2010 11:53 pm (UTC)
Oh, baby, you know what I like! *whistles*

I LOVE it when the UST is on Sherlock's side instead of Lestrade's - especially when it's as well done as this! Grinning like a loon here. I long for a follow-up to this, but if one's not forthcoming I'll be happy to imagine one. IN MY BUNK. :D
Dec. 22nd, 2010 12:53 am (UTC)
thank you very much! I'm glad you liked it.

it was fun writing the UST this way round for a change, so there might well be more at some point...
(no subject) - shezan - Dec. 22nd, 2010 01:28 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - fengirl88 - Dec. 22nd, 2010 07:26 am (UTC) - Expand
(Deleted comment)
Dec. 22nd, 2010 12:54 am (UTC)
thank you very much! glad you enjoyed it even though it's not your preferred pairing.
Dec. 22nd, 2010 12:07 am (UTC)
Angelo only gives Sherlock free food when he approves of his date! XD
Dec. 22nd, 2010 12:55 am (UTC)
very true - and a bit daft of Sherlock not to have worked that out beforehand. think the UST must have addled his brain earlier than he realized...
Dec. 22nd, 2010 12:50 am (UTC)
Your head canon Lestrade is so baaadddd!
Dec. 22nd, 2010 12:57 am (UTC)
thank you! very pleased you think so.
Dec. 22nd, 2010 01:49 am (UTC)
Indeed nice to see the UST coming from Sherlock; we see that too little. Lestrade being forceful is indeed very *swallows* hot. Ungh.
Dec. 22nd, 2010 07:27 am (UTC)
thank you! very glad you enjoyed it.

(Deleted comment)
Dec. 22nd, 2010 07:27 am (UTC)
thank you!

*melts at sight of your icon*
Dec. 22nd, 2010 02:32 am (UTC)
guh, baby, guh. I found myself in exactly Sherlock's head--or, er . . . body? due to your epic writerly skills. I too spilled a beverage, had a small choking fit (with giggles and with lust) and in the end would have let G. do whatever, wherever, whenever . . . *bites lip to keep from groaning* I would say "thank you" for the lovely fic, but there was an element of TORTURE here for me--again, channeling poor Sherlock . . . so . . . I will say thanks for a fine portrayal of Angelo as outraged on John's behalf. And on behalf of Sherlock (now feel I must be his advocate, as he is speechless and indisposed--wanking behind the restaurant). PLEASE. CAN LESTRADE COME FOR A VISIT SOON?? WE NEED HIM. A LOT.
Dec. 22nd, 2010 07:29 am (UTC)

thank you! and thank you for your help with it. I may not have laptop or lj in Scotland - if I get there! - but I will have pens and paper, so will think about what happens next...
Dec. 22nd, 2010 02:34 am (UTC)
I am on fire!
You really fueled my passion for this S/L pairing, which is new for me. Look at the UST.
They were so in character and I really dig your language, naturally sarcastic and precise, just as smart ass as that of DI Lestrade. :DDD
My fav version of Lestrade~
Dec. 22nd, 2010 07:30 am (UTC)
wow - thank you! very glad you liked it. *beams*
Dec. 22nd, 2010 02:45 am (UTC)
Well that was....is it hot in here?

I think you must know that when people say "this isn't my preferred pairing" but they're all waving around in the comments sort of gasping that you've done magnificently well.

And this:
"Sherlock had tried being annoying, being enigmatic, showing off, winking, insults, deliberately standing too close to Lestrade at crime scenes"

I can totally see him doing those things. He's not used to being ignored, is he. Please continue this after the holidays!
Dec. 22nd, 2010 07:31 am (UTC)
thank you very much! *blushes and squeaks*

no he's not used to it at all! very glad you liked that part (I enjoyed writing it).

I'll be trying to think how the next bit goes...
Dec. 22nd, 2010 03:33 am (UTC)
Noooooo, full body search! Come back, Lestrade and do it!

Ahem. *calms down* Can you tell I liked it? ;)
Dec. 22nd, 2010 07:32 am (UTC)
very glad you enjoyed it - thank you! I enjoyed writing them this way round for a change...
Dec. 22nd, 2010 04:39 am (UTC)
Finally caught up, and what a pleasure it is! There really has to be a sequel to this, (a) because we all want to know what happens next, and (b) to tell us what's inspired Lestrade to be so glorious from the night of the drugs bust. It's John, isn't it? Instead of suffering agonies of jealousy, he's somehow managed to translate it into a bravura performance of "see if I care". And oh, does Sherlock deserve it!
Dec. 22nd, 2010 07:33 am (UTC)
hurrah for patch buddies!

thank you very much - very glad you enjoyed it.

and yup, Sherlock had it coming...
Dec. 22nd, 2010 06:19 am (UTC)
*melts* Your Lestrade is my favourite thing ever. This is better than Christmas! Better than serial suicides! I don't know if you know this, but I literally asked for Dom Lestrade for xmas on my LJ. And you went and filled it for me! :D
I'm just going to go lay down for a bit...
Dec. 22nd, 2010 07:34 am (UTC)
*blushes and squeaks*

thank you very much! oh - I didn't know, or I'd forgotten if I had seen your request. but I'm very glad you got what you wanted!
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